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Arsenic and Old Lace
The Brewster family of Brooklyn is descended from Mayflower settlers who "scalped the Indians " instead of the other way around, according to Mortimer Brewster. On Halloween day, Mortimer, a theater critic and author who has repeatedly denounced marriage as "an old-fashioned superstition", marries Elaine Harper, his neighbor and a minister's daughter. Before leaving for their Niagara Falls honeymoon, Elaine goes to her father's house to share the news of her marriage, while Mortimer informs his aunts, Abby and Martha, who raised him in the old family home. Mortimer's delusional younger brother, Teddy, who believes he is Theodore Roosevelt, resides with them. Frequently, while running upstairs, Teddy blows a bugle and yells "Charge!", imitating Roosevelt's 1898 charge up San Juan Hill.
Searching for the notes for his next book, Mortimer finds a corpse hidden in the window seat. He assumes in horror that Teddy's delusions have led him to murder. Abby and Martha cheerfully confess to killing Mr. Hoskins, explaining that they minister to lonely old bachelors by ending their "suffering". They post a "Room for Rent" sign to attract a suitable subject for their "charity", then serve a glass of elderberry wine spiked with arsenic, strychnine, and cyanide. Including Mr. Hoskins, the aunts have murdered twelve men; the bodies are buried in the cellar by Teddy, who believes they are yellow fever victims at the Panama Canal. Teddy moves Mr. Hoskins from the window seat down to the cellar.
To protect his aunts in case the bodies are discovered, Mortimer frantically leaves to file paperwork to have Teddy legally committed to the Happy Dale mental asylum. In Mortimer's absence, his older brother, Jonathan, arrives with his alcoholic accomplice, plastic surgeon Dr. Herman Einstein. Altered by Einstein while drunk, Jonathan's face resembles Boris Karloff 's Frankenstein appearance. Jonathan is a serial killer with a body count of twelve, fleeing from the police, and intending to dispose of his latest murder victim, Mr. Spenalzo.
Shortly after Jonathan and Einstein hide Spenalzo's body in the window seat, Mortimer returns; discovering the corpse, he demands that the pair leave. However, the two criminals reveal they have found Mr. Hoskins' body in the cellar. Mortimer rushes out to obtain a second signature for Teddy's commitment papers. Learning his aunts' secret and mocked by Einstein for their equivalent victim tally, Jonathan determines to increase his body count by killing Mortimer. Meanwhile, Mortimer visits Elaine, expressing his reservations about their marriage due to his family's insanity.
When Mortimer returns, Einstein offers him a chance to leave, distracting him while Jonathan takes Spenalzo to the cellar. Mortimer decries the stupidity of characters in plays who are aware that they are in a house with killers but fail to realize the danger. Sneaking up from behind, Jonathan ties up and gags Mortimer. While Jonathan and Einstein argue about killing Mortimer, Officer O'Hara arrives in response to complaints from neighbors regarding Teddy's bugle blasts. After Einstein claims that Mortimer is enacting a scene from a play, O'Hara excitedly recites the plot of the play he is writing. Jonathan prepares to kill O'Hara but is knocked out by Einstein.
O'Hara's partners arrive looking for the overdue O'Hara; mistaking an imminent arrest, Jonathan discloses the thirteen bodies buried in the cellar. Lieutenant Rooney arrives looking for the errant officers; recognizing Jonathan from "Wanted" posters as an escapee from an Indiana mental asylum, he arrests Jonathan, discounting his claim. When Mr. Witherspoon comes to take Teddy to Happy Dale, Abby and Martha insist on joining him. Einstein flees after signing the aunts' commitment papers.
After Mortimer signs the papers as next of kin, the aunts inform him that he is not actually a Brewster; his mother was the family cook and his father was a chef on a steamship. Ecstatic, Mortimer rushes to find Elaine, who is horrified after discovering the corpses in the cellar. Before Elaine can exclaim about the bodies in the presence of others, Mortimer silences her by kissing her and whisking her off on their honeymoon.